April Fools' Day has long been a favorite of exactly no one. The branded "pranks" are very forced and pretty much harmful to careers and incredibly tedious. Its prime hater, Stephen Colbert, dedicated a couple minutes to bashing it last night on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert, following on from his former colleague John Oliver's rant last year.
Colbert takes a slightly different approach to the annual prank day, saying in his monologue last night: "It's April 1st and I love April Fool's pranks. April Fools: I really don't like them. Call me crazy but shocking or frightening your loved ones is not a national holiday." He continues to give hypothetical situations where April Fools might get on your nerves. "Your landlord might come by and demand you pay him a lot of money to keep living in your home. Okay? Don't fall for it. Okay? He pulled the same trick for the first of the month last month."
He goes on to talk about how April Fools are ruining the day online, "Over at the website Porn Hub, which I have been told exists, they changed their name today to Corn Hub and replaced all their dirty movies with footage of corn." Playing on the wealth of porn and corn puns in the English language, he continues, "There was some hardcore shucking going on," and that "I'm a little concerned because anyone who watches that is going to have unrealistic body standards: Those are obviously not natural niblets."
He rounds off the monologue with perhaps the one thing we wish was a prank: Donald Trump's presidential campaign.
