"I'm about to break your back, fool."
We here at Complex love a good video game almost as much as we love a funny pause-worthy moment. That's why it was truly worlds colliding when we came across (uh, yeah) the just-dropped trailer for 505 Games' upcoming football title for...wait for it...Backbreaker. Yes, we've been known to pause rappers, MLB stars, and even Archie, but pause-worthy video games are really right up our alley (yep!). So without further ado, we present to you, in chronological order, The Most Pause-Worthy Video Game Titles of All Time...
Beamrider
CONSOLES: Atari 2600
YEAR: 1983
COMPLEX SAYS: Dude, you know your dad played this while you were sleeping.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------BallBlazer Champions
CONSOLES: PlayStation
YEAR: 1997
COMPLEX SAYS: Uh, "BallBlazer Champion"? That's a title you can keep for yourself, chief.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Critical Blow
CONSOLES: PlayStation
YEAR: 1997
COMPLEX SAYS: The goal of this game is to get domed out by Janet Maslin. Ha. Ha.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Eggs of Steel
CONSOLES: PlayStation
YEAR: 1998
COMPLEX SAYS: Video game addicts are quite familiar with getting left with that "eggs of steel" feeling. Ouch.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Super Smash Bros.
CONSOLES: Nintendo 64
YEAR: 1998
COMPLEX SAYS: We had a feeling about that Mario. Never trust a mustachioed plumber.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Irritating Stick
CONSOLES: PlayStation
YEAR: 1999
COMPLEX SAYS: We're pretty sure there's a cream for that, homie.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Mr. Driller
CONSOLES: Wii, PlayStation, PC, Game Boy Color, WonderSwan Color, Arcade
YEAR: 2000
COMPLEX SAYS: Mr. Driller? Looks more like a bottom to us.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Seaman
CONSOLES: PlayStation 2, Dreamcast, PC
YEAR: 2000
COMPLEX SAYS: Caution...Seaman. See? We gave you fair warning!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Shrek Extra Large
CONSOLES: Xbox, GameCube
YEAR: 2002
COMPLEX SAYS: No wonder Fiona was so sprung.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The Sims: Bustin' Out
CONSOLES: PlayStation 2, Xbox, Game Boy Advance, N-Gage
YEAR: 2003
COMPLEX SAYS: And you thought that Sims only got down by showing their little hearts and slinking away to the bedroom.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tube Slider
CONSOLES: Gamecube
YEAR: 2003
COMPLEX SAYS: If you get good at this racing game, you can tell your friends how great you are at tube-sliding. They'll like that.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Brain Age
CONSOLES: Nintendo DS
YEAR: 2006
COMPLEX SAYS: We don't need this game to know the difference between 35-year-old brain and 16-year-old brain. Uh, we mean 18-year-old brain.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Beatmania
CONSOLES: PlayStation 2
YEAR: 2006
COMPLEX SAYS: We know, we know—this brings back a lot of teenage memories.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Face Training
CONSOLES: Nintendo DS
YEAR:2007
COMPLEX SAYS: Or, as we like to call it: "Dates 3-5."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------TouchMaster
CONSOLES: Nintendo DS
YEAR: 2007
COMPLEX SAYS: We heard Shane Sparks did the voiceover work for this one. Too soon?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The Bigs
CONSOLES: 360, PS3, Wii, PS2, PSP
YEAR: 2007
COMPLEX SAYS: Dudes swinging some heavy bats in this one.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Dragon Ball Z: Burst Limit
CONSOLES: 360, PS3
YEAR: 2008
COMPLEX SAYS: The whole Dragon Ball Z universe is kinda suspect: everybody's 'roided out and the Z-fighters periodically enter an isolated hyperbolic time chamber (with a two dude limit) to "train."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Pipe Mania
CONSOLES: Wii, PlayStation 2, PC, Nintendo DS, PSP
YEAR: 2008
COMPLEX SAYS: A.k.a., "When Becky Went To College."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------My Horse and Me
CONSOLES: Wii, PC, Nintendo DS
YEAR: 2008
COMPLEX SAYS: We actually saw a show in Mexico last year with the same title.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wet
CONSOLES: 360, PS3
YEAR: 2009
COMPLEX SAYS: Complex cover girl Eliza Dushku did the voiceover work for this game, which is awesome. You telling your boys how excited you are about getting Wet is not.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Shooting Love, 200X
CONSOLES: 360
YEAR: 2009
COMPLEX SAYS: Her: "200 times???" You: "It's shooting LOVE, baby. LOVE!"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Squeeballs Party
CONSOLES:360, PS3, Wii, Nintendo DS
YEAR: 2010
COMPLEX SAYS: Ain't no party like a Squeeballs Party, y'all.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Heavy Rain
CONSOLES: PS3
YEAR: 2010
COMPLEX SAYS: Alternate title: "Viscous Rain."
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RELATED:
• THE 69 MOST PAUSE-WORTHY LYRICS IN HIP-HOP HISTORY!
• COMPLEX'S TOP 100 VIDEO GAMES OF THE DECADE!
• COMPLEX'S TOP 25 VIDEO GAMES OF 2009
